Nation’s Toddlers Celebrate Death of Known Child-Molester

Reports of the death of Michael Jackson, though seemingly tragic, filled me with absolutely no emotion whatsoever. To me, and much of my generation, Jackson has never been more to us than a bizarre sideshow, and a source of cover material for bands like Fall Out Boy. Jackson’s tyrannical chokehold on Beatles songs has been a thorn in the side of many artists who wish to reproduce the songs.

From Jackson’s “Neverland Ranch” to his $38 million in debt, bankruptcy, repeated plastic surgeries, dangling baby incident, bizarre behavior in public, and his occasional stage antics, I have seen nothing in this man that deserves my lamentation over his demise.

I am not a heartless person, I did not wish for his dead. Nor do I revel in it. But I do not miss him.


_